Made of Great

In the (rather short) course of my 20-year old life, I have had the pleasure of meeting quite a lot of people. Of course, some weren't a pleasure, but the most were, and a few of those are indeed memorable. However, there is one person who has left an indelible mark on my mind, and I would like to share her story now.

Lakshmi amma.

She was our household help for four years, until we moved to another locality. She was around thirty years old, and I hardly ever spoke to her, so most of what I know about her is from what my mom told me about her, and a bit of what I overheard when they were speaking.

She was married at a very young age to a much older man, which is not very uncommon especially in the poorer sections of the society. She later had four kids with him, three of whom are daughters and the youngest one is a son. She practically doesn't know about the whereabouts of her husband - he comes home once in a few days, and most of the time he's heavily drunk. Her body bears testimony to innumerable insults inflicted upon by her husband. Thus, she is faced with the responsibility of raising up her four kids all by herself.

Getting enough money for just the basic amenities is a struggle for many in India, and that's the one word that sums up her life - "struggle". She toils incessantly from morning to evening in a large number of houses, and works as a night-shift labourer after sunset. Above anything else, she is determined that her kids should never have to face a situation like hers, and therefore her first priority is to ensure that they go to school, no matter what hardships she may have to face for that.

For her single-minded resoluteness despite harsh circumstances, she sure is made of great.

This post was written for the indiblogger contest #madeofgreat. To know more, visit http://madeofgreat.tatamotors.com/
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The Elixir called Honey

Food. It's one thing we can never live without. Thus not surprisingly, the quality of food we eat has a profound influence on our lives.

You must've often heard of the term "balanced diet" when referring to healthy food habits. So, what exactly is a balanced diet? It is a diet that consists of right amount of essential nutrients such as carbohydrates, proteins, fats, vitamins, minerals, roughage and water required by the body. The importance of a balanced diet for the maintenance of good health cannot be understated.

It's an old adage that generally whatever is good for the tongue is bad for the body, and vice versa (bitter gourds please!). Yet, honey stands out as a glaring exception. We've all loved honey since our childhood, but do we know of its wonder benefits? Well, our ancestors definitely did. Cave paintings in Spain from around 7000 BC depict beekeeping, showing that it was clearly in vogue even from back then.

Honey plays an excellent role in weight management; the tradition of a teaspoonful of honey with warm water in the morning is known since the old times. The sweet taste of honey is a brilliant substitute for sugar - while containing fewer calories than the latter. It also helps in proper digestion of food and is a good source of energy as well. And last but not the least, honey keeps your skin bright and glowing!

The medicinal properties of honey are well known too, the most popular one being its use for simple cough and cold relief. There is also a widespread misconception that honey should not be taken during summers. This has been found to have no scientific basis - on the contrary, honey actually keeps our bodies energetic by providing a rich source of carbohydrates.

Nowadays, crash diets are becoming a common habit among middle-aged professionals as they simply do not have sufficient time to fit in a balanced diet in their busy schedules. This is certainly not a good habit and leads to a myriad variety of health issues in the long run. It does not provide enough proteins, essential vitamins and minerals but is overloaded with carbohydrates, resulting in an unhealthy mismatch. A spoon of honey a day - together with balanced meals, of course - has the potential to go a long way in improving the overall quality of life of these individuals.

Recognizing the importance of honey in our diets, Dabur presents the concept of Honey Diet - a sweeter alternative: taking just one spoonful of honey in the morning with a glass of warm water. For further information on this and to plan your daily diet, please visit http://www.daburhoney.com/ and start your journey towards a healthier life now!

Starting a new life... what it feels like to be in medicine

It is often said that if there's anything at all that is constant in this world, it's change. It can be such a heartening thing as well as a depressing thing at times - no matter how good or bad the moment might be, it's never going to be repeated again. Many of us loved our school days, but ultimately the goal of school is to learn from it and move ahead with life. I'm a twenty year-old who's been living in the same city since kindergarten, hence for someone who's viewing me from outside, it'd be rather difficult to pinpoint one particular moment in my life that was a paradigm shift or something which set me on a totally different track. However, when I look back upon the rather short course of my existence on this planet, I find that change has indeed hit me - in a gradual yet very substantial manner - my 20-year old self would find it hard to recognize my 15-year old self; and no, I'm not talking about appearance of course. Which forces me to think - what was so great about the past five years that led me to, if I may put it that way, "start a new life"?

Well, the biggest visible change is of course - joining medical college. In a lot of ways, college has changed me and opened me up in a way I never thought was possible with me. Let me share with you what really goes on in the mind of a student when he/she is in medicine and is on the path to getting that "Dr." prefix before their name. Of course, each profession has their uniquenesses, but since I'm in medicine and have experienced it, I choose to articulate that here.

Well, the first day you walk in to medical college and bam! You find yourself in a room full of dead bodies lying on tables. Let's be honest - this might sound scary to some but once you're in it, it's actually intriguing. The feel of having to cut open those persons - yes, real persons, who once were full of life and had their own stories to tell - to observe and learn what literally lies inside us, is well, surreal, when you think of it. And then you get absolutely submerged in the ocean of anatomy, physiology and biochemistry - the syllabus is enormous. It's when you actually begin to have real respect for doctors - for having gone through so much, and well, that's just the first year. Those who were toppers in school are now more than happy to just scrape through over 50%. In the first ever internal assessment test which I wrote after joining college, a grand total of nine students passed (out of 150), yours truly not included.

Then comes second year. It's comparatively more relaxed... and by this time, you're quite familiar with the college; you've made friends with the seniors and the newly arrived juniors... and you get closer to your classmates, so college feels much more familiar. If you're lucky, you get to go to Pulse, an annual fest at AIIMS, Delhi - we couldn't go, but I've heard it's pretty amazing. This is also the time when you start going to the hospital and start interacting with patients - and for the first time, get face-to-face with real people's problems and poverty, and how far we need to go before we can call ourselves a developed nation. You get in touch with different types of people from varying cultures - the beauty of our country - and how all those barriers stand absolutely nullified in the doctor-patient relationship. You also get acquainted to the challenges you're about to face... get to see a few surgeries, a few people dying right in front of your eyes, a few postmortems. It becomes commonplace. You talk to your female classmates about medical stuff which you'd get slapped for if you were to talk about that to any non-medico.

My third year has just begun. Let's see how it goes :D

So yeah, in short, medical college has really made start a new life. What's your story?

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Trying out hospital photography

So... there was this photography competition by the medical magazine Lexicon, which called on contestants to capture what they think would depict hospital life, with a story behind it. Here's my entry:

Story: Welcome to the hospital. A place where life always runs on the fast lane. Where emergency is routine. Where every second counts.

If you like the photo, kindly open the link below, please hit 'Like' and help me win the contest! Thanks a lot :)
https://www.facebook.com/lexiconin/photos/a.765658926832328.1073741832.468642343200656/765673713497516/?type=1&theater
 

I saw death today.

25 April. It was a cloudy morning as I walked into the medicine ward of the hospital, and I was greeted by a rather usual scene.

An old woman was sitting on the floor towards a corner, crying hysterically. Beside her there was a young woman, about her daughter's age, whose face looked very sombre. There was a middle-aged man next to them, who was also weeping while talking on his cellphone.

One needed no further explanation - it was clear that someone had died a short while ago. However, apart from the three of them, the rest of the corridor appeared absolutely unconcerned about it - it was, like I said, a usual scene there.

Now, contrast it with the death of Nelson Mandela last year. Mandela, I believe, needs no introduction - he was a father figure to the millions he had liberated from discrimination. His funeral was attended by most of the prominent world leaders and about 80,000 other people. It was declared a national holiday; and it is certain that he shall be remembered for a really long time after his death.

Both of them were humans of flesh and blood, and both of them were given a resting place beneath the earth where they shall be reduced to nothing but bones - yet one was mourned only by his immediate family, yet another was given a farewell by the entire world. Why, may I ask, does the world show this brazen duplicity?

We humans are a funny lot. All our lives, we strive for ourselves to be more accepted. Does that girl/guy like me? Do people think I am weird? Is my facebook profile picture going to get enough likes? Yet, what's going to happen when I turn my back? Everyone knows that in the end, one thing is absolutely certain - we're all going to be reduced to ashes or bones or something else - depending on how our kin and customs choose to dispose of us.

Then what was the fundamental difference between those two people? When you die, would you like the aftermath of your death to be described as a usual scene, or as an event which a sizeable number of people are going to remember?

In the course of our existence upon this planet, we meet a lot of people and do a lot of stuff - some for ourselves, some for others. We make varying impressions on a lot of people. You don't have to be a world figure to do that. A doctor who's saving lives. A construction worker who's building houses. A comedian who's giving people a good laugh. A writer who influences people. A bus driver who slows down so that the man running behind can get in on time and won't get fired by his boss. A brother who gives his sister a warm little hug when she's down. A mother. Some of our impressions on certain people are so deep that they become an integral part of our lives - most are not so profound, but still good enough to make a change.

In the end, life just boils down to the people whose lives you touch - small or big, whichever way possible. Make sure you're not the one mourning at your own death. Make sure you don't end up with a lifetime in which you're lying all alone on your deathbed and wondering 'dude, people are gonna remember me, right?'!

Thanks a lot to Scintilla Magazine for publishing this article of mine in their November 2015 edition. You can read it here.

© Scintilla Magazine

Building your own army

It's often said that you cannot have a huge castle built on foundations of sand - it'll collapse sooner than later. For the castle to remain standing in all circumstances - and of course, the vagaries of nature are manifold, you cannot expect to have pleasant weather all the time - the first thing you need to do is to make sure your foundation is strong enough.

Now, once the foundation has been built, what can be the next step to protect the castle? There are enemies all around, waiting to attack your newly constructed edifice at the first opportunity. So, it's time to raise an army of valiant soldiers who can guard your castle at all times!

Wonder why I'm talking about building castles and armies in a post that's for a contest titled 'An Immune India'? Nah, it's not because I've got myself addicted to war movies... it's just that what you've been reading so far is not very different from our own body's mechanisms.

The immune system refers to the functioning of the body that deals with fighting infections and other foreign matter. It's our body's natural defence system - one that we're all born with - and it gets strengthened further from about a few hours after we're born - first from mother's milk, and later by vaccines that stimulate our immune systems to produce tiny molecules called antibodies to fight against dreaded diseases.

The fact that the failure of the immune system can be a one-way route to death (as seen in AIDS) signifies the paramount importance that it has got. If a nation doesn't have a strong army, it would soon be invaded by its enemies and perish. Likewise, the process of building a strong foundation by developing a healthy immune system has to begin right from a very young age.

But how?

Begin with mother's milk - as mentioned above. No matter what anyone says, there's no identical substitute for it. It definitely gives a much-needed boost to the baby's immune system.

Listen to whatever the doctor says. A balanced diet is necessary, and so is adequate water. These two practices, though very simple, can go a long way in ensuring that your immunity stays strong and you're well protected from a huge amount of illnesses. And so is good sleep!

All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy; and it makes his immune system dull, too. Tell your kids to go out and play! (or if you've got siblings or cousins or friends who are kids, tell them to drop the Xbox console and indulge in some street cricket instead.) Nothing beats physical exercise when it comes to maintaining a fit and healthy body.

So, these were the ways in which you can modify the lifestyle of kids so that their immunity develops. But then, in today's world where the environment is fast deteriorating and there are infectious agents lurking everywhere, is this enough?

It's always better to be safe than sorry - and that's why, it's definitely preferable to give our immune systems a shot in the arm with various additives taken in the diet. And what better place to look for these than our ancient Ayurvedic texts?

Remember how our grandmothers used to tell us to chew on amla? Modern science has proven that amla (or Indian gooseberry) is indeed a powerful antioxidant and immunity stimulant. There are many other herbs too - mustak, for example: which is an anti-inflammatory drug, and guduchi: which has immunomodulatory properties - which all help to boost our immunity in all spheres.

All of these herbs - numbering around 40 - are mixed in proportionate amounts to create a formula known as chyawanprash. Chyawanprash is not a new thing - it is mentioned in texts as old as the Mahabharata. And it has been certified by modern science too to be very effective - no surprise that our forefathers knew so much!

For many years, Dabur has been selling chyawanprash which has been proven to be incredibly effective in developing immunity. It's a universal fact that kids hate taking sour medicines... but this is different! Dabur Chyawanprash even comes in a variety of flavours - such as mango and mixed fruit - to make it pleasant to the tongue as well. Now, what's better than a medicinal formula that makes immunity strong while being delicious at the same time? And it's not just for kids - people of all ages can relish it with pleasure.

Give it a try. And if you want to know more about it, visit http://www.daburchyawanprash.com/

This post is written for the contest An Immune India on IndiBlogger. For more details on the product mentioned here, visit www.daburchyawanprash.com

OMG, it's dead!

A few minutes ago, a friend was telling me about how some of her non-medico friends told her they didn't wanna take up medicine because, well, they simply couldn't "handle the dead body stuff". Last week, my aunt appeared absolutely scared when I was telling her the stuff we do in the dissection hall - cutting up a cadaver's skin, then scraping out the fat, tearing out the muscles one by one, taking out the heart and intestines and holding them from every angle possible. Honestly speaking, it was interesting - nay, it was hilarious - to see the expression on my aunt's face.

Indeed, one question has been put to me perhaps much more than any other, when people ask me about the stuff we do in college - "Aren't you scared dealing with dead bodies?". The dissection videos on YouTube say, "Content Warning. This video may be inappropriate for some users." To be frank, I don't get it. Of course, cutting up a dead body isn't really a form of pleasure - it stinks, and the strong odour of formalin sears into your eyes. The slimy intestines aren't exactly impressive to hold either. But... fear? If at all you should be afraid of something, it should be a living person - he/she can punch you, kick you and er, kill you. But a dead person is well, dead! What can a cadaver do to you anyway?

I can understand why people fear death - because let's face it, it's the biggest mystery known to mankind. Nobody knows for sure what happens after death. And thus naturally, people fear the unknown - the same reason why little kids get scared when they step into a dark room: they don't know what is in the room. However, to be afraid of a harmless, actionless dead body lying quietly on a table is to me, something that defies all logic. I'm still looking for an answer; and I'm quite convinced there is none.

Stretching it too far

There comes a moment in your life when you feel like you've just come round a full circle. You get out of the threshold, break your own self-created shell, experience new things, have fun, bask in the glory, enjoy the new life, be admired by others for what you're doing, admire yourself for what you're doing... and then get used to it. You feel like this is the new you, that your old personality has been discarded forever. You feel you've changed. When you look at your own past, you just can't relate with it anymore. It feels so distant, awkward, other-worldly. All of a sudden, life seems so interesting. You start thinking, why didn't I change before?!

Weeks go on... and this new life becomes an inseparable part of you. Or so it seems. You start indulging in the new things more often than ever before, and you really like it. Then a month, two months... it goes on and on, every morning, afternoon, night. Just a continuous flow, and no hint of the person that you were, just a few months ago. It's official now: You. Have. Changed.

As months pass by, everything seems wonderful..... And then, slowly, steadily, unnoticed by you, something seems unnatural. It's a clear blue sky... but in the edge, just entering into the horizon, there's a small cloud. A small, harmless one that can never rain by itself. Still, it's there. But your mind is too engrossed in the blue sky to notice that small thing over there.

There's a peculiar thing called 'elasticity' which we had studied back in our physics classes. It basically states that every solid object has a limit which is known as a 'yield point'. Beyond that, the atoms (or molecules) can't stretch themselves further apart from each other, and they tend to revert back to their original position as soon as the stretching is stopped. However, if you still continue to stretch it... it breaks.

A perfectly elastic substance doesn't exist in reality.

But, there are two kinds of substances, Some are highly elastic, and some aren't. It's an innate, intrinsic property of each particular substance, one that cannot be changed.

And that's the way things should be handled. If you have a copper wire and attempt to increase its length just by pulling it with your fingers from both ends, the effect will not be tangible. However, if you have a rubberband, you can stretch it for a pretty long distance. In the case of the copper wire, you might still stretch if you like with all your might, but your efforts will simply go waste. Useless.

And with the rubberband, you can increase its length just by applying a little force. Stretch it, stretch it.... and then, you find the rubberband getting uncomfortable. It's resisting your actions. It's telling you to stop.

Here, you have a choice. Either, you can listen to it and stop, or you can continue stretching to see how far it goes.

But you're in no mood to stop. You find this new sense of stretch exhilarating. Your diameter is much bigger than before! A stretched rubberband gives you the sense of adventure, the feeling of being on the edge. The previous, unstretched, inactive state was so dull and boring, wasn't it? No, you've changed! There's no way in hell you're going to stop!

So, you stretch further. Go on. It expands further. But then, you find the strand of the rubberband getting thinner and thinner. That's a sign of weakness, that it wasn't as strong as it was before. You pay no heed. It's expanding, it's getting bigger, and that's all that matters to you.

Snap.

It breaks. Gone. All the euphoria, the excitement, the happiness - gone. Just like that. In a microsecond. It's all over, now. This rubberband is of no use to you anymore.

So, what happened? You basically tried to stretch it beyond what is known as its 'yield point'. You tried to do something more than what is within its limit. And inevitably, you couldn't. That's the reason they call it a "limit".

So, what's the point here?

Good question. The point is, whenever there's a limit to something, it shouldn't be crossed. There's no limit to your dreams, your achievements, your kindness... no, there isn't. But there's a limit to how far you can stretch things with a person when you know it's not going to work out. There's a limit to things which involve you and another person, because the other person may not think on the same lines as you do. Why? Because you weren't good enough? No! There are things in life which simply aren't meant to be. You might be awesomeness personified, but that doesn't mean you're going to get EVERYTHING in life. There are things that defy all logic.. and maturity involves accepting this fact. If you don't accept it, then well, you aren't awesomeness personified. Plain as that.

So yeah, be mature. Take control. Stop stretching. There's no need to revert back to the original position; just stay the way you are and you'll be fine with it. It's much, much better than breaking it.

The rubberband is precious, bro. Keep it.

The Healing Touch - Redefined

Once upon a time, people lived in a world in which getting rid of a disease was considered a grave challenge, a very long process that was incredibly painful to the patient. No, I'm not talking about the ancient days when anaesthesia did not exist and surgeries used to be conducted with patients screaming aloud throughout. Even thirty years ago, people still shuddered at the thought of going to a doctor.

Treating a patient is still considered a challenge, as no two humans are alike. However, thankfully, the world has changed a lot for the better. Technology has revolutionized people's lives, and in no other field has it been more profound than in healthcare.

Take an example. Yuvraj Singh was diagnosed with lung cancer a few days after the 2011 World Cup. He was promptly given state-of-the-art treatment that lasted for a few months. And the result? He was back, hitting sixes like he always used to! Could this have been possible even a decade ago? I think not.

Yuvraj Singh's case was a famous example, where the power of modern technology in the medical field was visible to the whole world. Yet, there are hundreds of instances everyday around the globe, where modern healthcare is touching lives in ways it has never done before.

Let's see how this works. A person goes to a doctor complaining of recurrent headache. Now, what can the cause possibly be? It can be migraine, a persistent cold, or simply a result of staring for long hours at a computer screen every night. Or it can be a growing brain tumor. Now suppose our patient is one of those unfortunate rare cases with the tumor. If he were living thirty years ago, the doctor would've probably started with some basic pain-relief medicines... and by then, the tumor would've grown much bigger. Now, with X-ray systems available virtually everywhere (Wikipedia tells me that an estimated 5 billion X-ray tests were done worldwide in 2010) the doctor can identify the cause straightaway, and plan the next course of action.

What would be the next course of action?

Until recently, a brain tumor was considered a highway to death. Patients with such cases were asked to "wind up their affairs" - in other words, get ready to die. Not anymore. We now have advanced forms of radiosurgery that can make recovering from certain forms of tumors and cancers not just possible, but also relatively painless.

Not just radiosurgery, but it's amazing to see how technology has transformed the way of doing things even in a standard operation theatre. Robotic surgeries allow doctors to have much higher precision than what was possible earlier; and in addition, the patients can go home quicker as well. The list of achievements in modern healthcare is endless - right from medicines that now act upon their target in a much more precise and quick way; they surely have come a long way from when penicillin was first discovered, to transplants that now permit even multiple organs to be transferred at a time from one person to another. And it'll be interesting to watch what the future has in store for us. As the researchers toil in the labs everyday, stem cell therapy may soon occupy centrestage in being the answer to a wide variety of problems.
 

This sudden explosion of technology in medicine - not just in the developed countries, but also developing ones like ours - has led to a whole new phenomenon: medical tourism. An estimated 150,000 people travel to India every year to seek a remedy for their illnesses which may or may not be available in their own country - usually if it's available there, it's exorbitantly priced.

The contemporary lifestyle, though, has brought its fair share of problems with itself. Lack of physical activity has led to obesity becoming not something to be laughed at -  but a real, life-threatening disorder. Thankfully, modern science has an answer to that too. Bariatric surgery - though commonly reckoned as a last resort - has given a new lease of life to a large number of patients across the world. And obesity is not the only negative consequence of the modern lifestyle and environment on health - it has also resulted in several other problems such as respiratory disorders (thanks to the enormous pollution), eye problems and an accelerated rate of degenerative diseases. Science is trying to find an answer to that too.

Everyday, even as you read this, doctors, scientists and other allied professionals are leaving no stone unturned in their quest for a healthy, disease-free world. In fact, it's not limited to the medical field - contributions from nearly every branch of science are involved in the technological advancements that we've seen. And being a medical student myself, it is my responsibility too not just to serve people with the facilities that are available right now; but also to seek newer, more efficient and effective ways of curing people. Modern hi-tech innovations have not just given a ray of hope to millions of sufferers; they have also made the doctor's job a lot easier.

And it's important that we don't allow ourselves to take a break in this hunt for new innovations; but strive continuously to move forward. There is hope.

This post was written as a part of the contest How Does Modern Healthcare Touch Lives? conducted by IndiBlogger and Apollo Hospitals. Apollo Hospitals has consistently been pioneering healthcare developments in India - you can read a whole list of those here: http://www.apollohospitals.com/cutting-edge.php  

Love thyself

This post had been due since long, but it's finally here.

I was on a holiday at Madurai, staying at a resort. It seemed like one of the most peaceful places on earth.. there was no traffic, no pollution, no people screaming.. nothing. The scenery was just breathtakingly beautiful.

And, I was at peace with myself. One of the main reasons probably was that I was practically disconnected from the rest of the world.

My phone was in flight mode. No checking messages every now and then. No seeing how many people liked my status. No scrolling through tweets. No one calling to ask about college-related stuff.


Just plain, uninterrupted silence.

As I sat beside the swimming pool, clicking photos, I realized how happy I was at that moment. 

I wished I could live that way forever.

No, seriously. I thought about it. Imagine I had endless money and my life from then would only be chilling out in the resort room, walking to the restaurant whenever I felt hungry and going to places around the city at times. An absolutely carefree, comfortable life.

Of course, such a life would come across as rather pointless. I mean, one day I'd get bored of it and desperately want to go back to my previous world.  But then, how would it be to go back to the previous world, have a proper aim in life, and yet stay at peace from within just like I was in that resort?

The thought of being peaceful from being disconnected itself appears rather strange - and perhaps shocking too. It's not that I'm fed up of the people in my life - I've got quite a few close friends. Then why?

You see, there are two kinds of people in this world. One likes to stay in a group all the time, is loud, more often than not the centre of attention - they're called extroverts. And there's one more kind who likes to spend time with themselves. They don't view it as loneliness; they see it as a pleasant time. A blissful solitude. They're the introverts.

If you've been able to relate yourself to a certain extent with the feeling of peace on being alone that I was talking about earlier, odds are that you belong to the second category. Welcome to the family, mate.

It's not that we don't like the company of people. In fact, we rejoice in it. We love long, thoughtful conversations - with one person at a time. We like it when someone applauds or adores us from a distance - but we love it when someone understands us for what we are, what we think. It's a pleasure to have someone connect with us on a subtle level - as opposed to a superficial level of admiration. And yeah, sometimes, we need time to be totally disconnected - to analyze, discuss and plan the various things we do with the person who knows us better than anyone else- ourselves.

We believe in plain, in-your-face talk. No pretending, no acting 'sweet'. But it's unfortunate why many misunderstand our way of being straightforward, and call us rude.

We revel in a quiet atmosphere. It's amazing how much work we can do when we're given total freedom to do what we want. There's no end to the examples of introverts who have achieved great things in life. But it's not that we despise teamwork either - but we like it only when we have no restrictions, and our partners aren't too dominating - which would just be stupid, 'coz then we wouldn't be able to contribute our maximum.

We love ourselves. And we're proud of it.  

A little break..

It's been quite some time since I posted something here, and it's going to be longer before I do. I've got something in mind to write about, though... it's like a diary entry, only a lot deeper. So stay tuned; I'll be back soon.
(once again doing what I said I would be, in my first post in this blog - talking to myself :P)

The buck stops...where?

Two shocking incidents on opposite sides of the globe. One, a brutal gang rape and murder of a young girl in Delhi; the other, murder of 20 kids and seven adults in Connecticut. Different methods, yet the common strand of inhuman violence links the two. Both of them have sparked countless protests and debates, calling for "change". Yet, what exactly is to be changed? Who is to be blamed?

Let's talk about the Delhi incident first. In the past few days, hundreds of people gathered in Delhi and other cities, clamoring against toothless laws, inept police, a misplaced mindset of the society that assumes men "superior" to women, and so on. Every one of these points has their own merits. Some even went a step further and proclaimed that it was the girl who was responsible for the crime. Now that's like saying if you have a car and someone steals it, it's you who are at fault because you bought the car; and not the fault of the person who stole it. That, of course, doesn't make any sense.

Coming back to the question, I'm positive that 95% of us men in India are the kind of those who'd NEVER rape a woman. It's the remaining 5% that cause all the trouble. So, the big issue here isn't the "general psyche of Indian men". You can't point out 5% of the group and say there's something wrong with the entire male Indian mindset. Neither can you blame the so-called modern culture shown in movies and songs. If you look at the lyrics common among American rappers, you'll find those much much worse - yet a rape doesn't happen every 22 minutes in the USA, unlike here. It's not like men in India are born "evil" and those in the West are all decent. The main difference is: a deterrent.

The 5% of men in question here are plain psychopaths. Their brains are wired in a way as to display their masculinity and vent their desires in a manner that is anti-social, and has no absolutely no care for the feelings of another person. Such men can be found in many places. However, they actually bring their flawed mentality to a conclusion only in cases where they have no fear of the repercussions that may follow. Ask any convicted rapist - all of them will say that they believed they could get away scot-free from the crime. They believed they would never get caught. They believed that there was no one to stop them. And indeed, it is THIS that is to be really blamed here. The absence of stringent security. I know that it's not possible for there to be a policeman at every corner of the street - but at least we can have security cameras. And we can have laws - very strict laws - that invoke a sense of deep fear among those psychopaths.

However, we can't simply rest in comfort by putting all the blame on weak laws and inadequate security. Why haven't these laws and security measures come into place even after 65 years of independence? Who is responsible for these? Our politicians, of course. And if we keep voting for the kind of politicians who either do not change anything or worse, are themselves convicted of rape, then even all of us - indirectly - are to be blamed. I've turned 18 last month, and together with most of my friends, I'm definitely going to vote next year, keeping in mind the character of the candidate we're voting for. Let's hope we make a difference this time.

Coming to the second part - the slaughter of 27 people in an elementary school in Connecticut, USA. Personally, I was shocked by this news as two of my cousin sisters are elementary school students in Connecticut (thankfully, they go to a different school; they're fine). And as sympathy and mourning poured in from across the world, there was another strong feeling prevalent in the air.

Hatred.

A quick Facebook search with the killer's name, Adam Lanza, would reveal that. Hundreds of people, in different pages, all asserting "Adam Lanza should rot in hell", "I Hate Adam Lanza" and other rhetorics that are best not repeated here. Yes it's true, we're all justified in hating him for having snapped the life out of 20 little innocent kids, but does he really deserved to be solely blamed for his actions?

Almost every news agency that reported the tragedy has also reported that the killer in question was a 20-year old extremely lonely and intelligent guy who had no friends at all. According to the head of security at his school, Adam was "a very scared young boy, who was very nervous around people he could trust or he refused to speak with", and "a loner". This, as psychiatrists say, is a clear indication of Asperger's syndrome, a form of autism - which is an in-born genetic condition in almost all cases. Couple it with the fact that his parents divorced in 2008 - obviously not an emotionally pleasant situation for any child, let alone an autistic one.

You see it there. Adam's father was a successful finance executive at GE, and his mother was a teacher in the school where the massacre happened. Neither of them, evidently, had much time to take care of their psychologically disabled child. If they had been more caring towards their son, could the tragedy have been averted? Yes, I think so.

Besides this, Adam's mother was also an avid gun enthusiast and according to news reports, regularly used to take her son to shooting sessions. This probably could've been another factor in his actions - which in turn, has sparked furious debates over the arms trade system in the United States.

It is widely known that possessing a gun is very easy in the US. A large number of people have been demanding, especially after this incident, that the laws have to be changed. Mass shooting has occurred many times in the past too - and considering the fact that such incidents can be brought down to a large extent - if not eliminated completely - if gun control measures are put into force, it does make sense to partly blame the laws for such repeated instances. However, guns don't kill people; people kill people. And therefore, in my opinion, what really ought to be blamed here are not the laws; but the trend in modern society which is rapidly shifting towards isolation between parents and child, and consequently the care that children need is desperately lacking - especially those who suffer from a psychological disability.

An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind, said Mahatma Gandhi. Today, we see it happening.

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